Lessons

Why Gender-Neutral Pronouns Matter

In today’s diverse world, language is more than just grammar—it is a tool for respect and inclusion. Using gender-neutral pronouns ensures that communication does not assume or impose someone’s gender identity. As awareness of LGBTQ+ rights grows, so does the recognition of pronouns beyond the traditional “he” and “she.”

Learning how to use gender-neutral pronouns helps us:

  • Avoid misgendering others.

  • Promote inclusivity in workplaces, schools, and communities.

  • Respect identities across the gender spectrum.

Common Gender-Neutral Pronouns in English

The most widely used gender-neutral pronouns examples are variations of “they.” Though traditionally plural, “they” is also used in the singular sense to refer to someone whose gender is unknown or non-binary.

They / Them / Their / Theirs / Themselves

  • They love to go shopping.

  • I saw them at the park yesterday.

  • This is their favorite book.

  • The decision is theirs to make.

  • They can handle it themselves.

It – In some contexts, “it” can describe animals, objects, or non-gendered references, though it is rarely used for people due to dehumanizing connotations.

  • It looks like a rainbow.

  • It is living there. (rare for people, more common for objects/animals).

Expanded Sets of Gender-Neutral Pronouns

Beyond “they/them,” additional gender-neutral language in English has developed, often supported within LGBTQ+ communities. These variations provide more options for individuals who prefer pronouns outside the binary system.

According to the UW-Milwaukee LGBT Resource Center (2011), these are common sets:

  • He/She → Zie, Sie, Ey, Ve, Tey, E

  • Him/Her → Zim, Sie, Em, Ver, Ter, Em

  • His/Her → Zir, Hir, Eir, Vis, Tem, Eir

  • His/Hers → Zis, Hirs, Eirs, Vers, Ters, Eirs

  • Himself/Herself → Zieself, Hirself, Eirself, Verself, Terself, Emself

Additional Pronoun Sets (coined by writers and activists):

  • Ze/Zem/Zemself (Richard Creel, 1997)

  • Fae/Faer/Faerself

  • Ve/Vir/Vis/Verself (C. Hulme, 1980s)

  • Per/Pers/Perself (Marge Piercy, 1979)

  • Hu/Hum/Hus/Humself (Humanist, 1982)

  • Peh/Pehm/Pehself

These examples illustrate how language evolves to accommodate new understandings of identity.

How to Use Gender-Neutral Pronouns Respectfully

  1. Ask politely – If you’re unsure, ask someone their pronouns instead of assuming.

  2. Practice usage – Integrate pronouns into sentences until it feels natural.

  3. Respect correction – If corrected, adjust and move forward without over-apologizing.

  4. Avoid resistance – Using chosen pronouns isn’t about grammar rules; it’s about respecting identity.

  5. Model inclusivity – Share your own pronouns in introductions and email signatures.

Importance of Gender-Neutral Pronouns in Literature and Culture

Writers and educators increasingly use gender-neutral pronouns in literature to reflect inclusivity and mirror real-world diversity. They also challenge traditional linguistic structures, encouraging readers to expand their understanding of identity.

By incorporating pronouns like they, ze, or fae, literature creates space for marginalized voices and encourages broader acceptance in society.

Key Takeaway

Learning how to use gender-neutral pronouns is not just about grammar—it is about empathy, inclusivity, and respect. Whether it’s using “they/them” or newer pronoun sets like “ze” or “fae,” adapting our language helps create safe and welcoming spaces. Words matter, and the right pronoun affirms identity while strengthening communication.

Gabrielle Love Acero

Gabrielle Love Acero has nurtured a love for writing from a young age, expressing herself through stories, essays, and scripts. Her passion for the craft was strengthened by her fondness for reading books, articles, and informative publications, which broadened her perspective and enhanced her skills. She went on to explore scriptwriting and film production, even earning recognition in an interschool competition hosted by the Commission on Population (PopCom) – Region X, where one of her works placed among the top entries. Alongside her literary pursuits, Gabrielle has always been drawn to service and volunteerism. She has actively taken part in church ministries, engaging in music, teaching, and outreach programs aimed at uplifting communities and inspiring others. Her leadership roles in youth activities reflect her dedication, compassion, and commitment to serving both people and her faith. Gabrielle is also recognized for her strong sense of responsibility and organizational ability, qualities that shine in the many groups and initiatives she has contributed to. Whether in creative, community, or leadership roles, she exemplifies discipline, humility, and purpose, striving for excellence not for her own glory but as a reflection of her deeper values and calling.